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Fan Interview Friday: Bills Mafia



Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be a fan of the Buffalo Bills? I didn’t think so, but I interviewed a ride or die Bills fan anyway. It was full of passion, hot takes, and all of the NFL fan drama. Here is your first look into one of the many minds that makes up Bills Mafia.


Max: I consent to this recording.


Phew.


Max: My name is Maxwell Cobb and I’m a fan of the Buffalo Bills.


Maerck: How long have you been a fan of Buffalo?


Max: I’ve been a fan of Buffalo since basically the day I was born. I was born in ‘96 so for twenty-four years I’ve been a Buffalo fan. My parents were born in western New York, so growing up, my whole entire family was Bills fans. We always watched the Bills play and the Buffalo Sabres. We’ve been Buffalo everything, you know? I wish they’d bring back a Buffalo basketball team.


Maerck: What solidified you into being a Buffalo fan? Were there any defining moments that had you saying, ‘wow, this really is my team’?


Max: I think the thing that solidified it for me, I guess it wasn’t a particular moment, just the feeling I would get when I was watching the game with my family. There was always this sense for me that the Bills were a terrible team, and they always were when I was younger. Watching the games in my lifetime, I hadn’t seen them make the playoffs until recently. So growing up and just having that hope that we were going to do this, every year was going to be our year. Having that feeling and sharing it with your family and friends, that this could be the year that your team could win, I think that’s what really solidified it for me.


Maerck: Is there a most memorable moment of being a Bills fan?


Max: The most memorable for me has to be when the Bills made the playoffs for the first time in my life, which was a few years back. We needed Cincinnati to beat Baltimore and in the last minute of the game he [Andy Dalton] threw a touchdown. I was with my family, out in western New York, and we all just went crazy because this was the first time in a lot of our lives that we were going to be able to watch a Buffalo Bills playoff game.


Maerck: Have you ever considered switching teams?


Max: No, I’ve never considered switching teams, I’ve always been a Buffalo fan. I did root for some other teams along the way, partially. My uncle lived in New Orleans for a long time and he was a Saints fan. So while he was a Bills fan, he rooted for the Saints because he lived there. I like to see Drew Brees and Sean Payton do well, I like that team. And then, for some reason, I kind of like to root for the Chargers every once in a while. I like their powder blue jerseys and I liked that guy [LaDainian] Tomlinson. I never rooted for another team over the Bills, but there’s teams I rooted for behind the scenes.


Maerck: That’s fair. So who are your top three Bills players ever?


Max: Top three ever? This isn’t in any specific order, but the first one I’m going with, it’s Josh Allen, dude. I love Josh Allen. He’s a fucking beast and I think he’s the future of the franchise. I would honestly do awful things to hang out with Josh Allen. Terrible, even almost homosexual things, to hang out with Josh Allen.


*Coughs* “Almost.”


Max: Number two is Lee Evans, he was probably our best receiver that we had when I was growing up. He was just a fucking beast, dude. He was another one of those guys that was underrated by everyone. Third, I’m going with O.J. Simpson. That man is one of the best football players to ever touch the field. He is an amazing running back and you know, he never murdered anyone. Stats show he did not murder anyone. The glove did not fit. He’s just a classic Bill. If you love the Bills, you root for O.J. He’s still out here making funny videos on the internet and stuff. He’s one of the luckiest men on Earth. It’s insane.


Maerck: Who are your top three non Bills players?


Max: Number 1, we’ll go with Mike Vick. He was insane in Madden. I think left handed quarterbacks are just cool too. He was a mad quick guy. I mean, he had the whole dog fighting incident, but I think he gets more flak from that than he should at this point.


He did apologize - and he found Jesus. Allegedly.


Max: Then I would say Randy Moss. He’s just a fucking beast, you can’t stop that guy. Third, I’ll go with Ray Lewis, another potential murderer, so some will say. But just the way people talked about him in the league and some of those hits. I remember watching a video, Chad Johnson tried to hit Ray Lewis, and Ray Lewis just completely leveled him. Then he’s like, “you can’t run at five-two man, don’t even go for five-two. He’s too big”. I don’t know, I just think he was dominant. And Joe Flacco sucks and Ray Lewis carried him to a championship.


Max: I should’ve drank more before I started doing this.


Is that Bills Mafia’s motto?


Maerck: Do the Bills have a rival? Who is your personal rival?


Max: The Bills rival and my personal rival, is the Patriots. The Patriots and Tom Brady have run this division, the AFC East, for 20 odd years. No Bills fan can dispute that the Patriots are the worst and most annoying team in the league, and their fans are the worst and most annoying fans in the league. Have you ever tried to talk to a New England Patriot Fan? All you hear is them shitting out of their fucking mouth about Tom Brady and how he’s the greatest quarterback ever. He’s a fucking system QB who throws to little white guys running crossing routes and big huge tight ends, who are dirty players by the way.


Max: I don’t know if any of you remember this, but Rob Gronkowski laid a shoulder into the back of Tre'davious White’s head while he was laying on the ground. Completely uncalled for. I don’t know if he even got fined, cause he’s fucking Gronk, but he’s a fucking dirtbag and I respect him as a person because he drinks and he’s cool. I think I would have a lot of fun hanging out with him. I think he’s actually from Buffalo. So yeah, the Patriots are definitely the biggest rival, definitely my most hated team.


Max: And then the Cowboys, everybody fucking hates the Cowboys, me included. I can’t understand how anyone from New York is a Cowboys fan. When I see that, it disgusts me, like, what the fuck are you doing? Do you think you live in bumfuck Texas? You’re from New York, support a New York team. By the way, the only New York team is the Buffalo Bills. The Giants and Jets play in New Jersey, stinking New Jersey. So once again, the Patriots are the worst and Dallas sucks too. At Dowens you fucking dweeb, the Cowboys are awful. The only good thing you ever created was Cole Beasely. That man’s a legend and his career is amazing. As long as his non-vaccination doesn’t fuck everything up for us.


Maerck: Speaking of fucking it up or not, are there any superstitions you follow for the Bills?


Max: The only real superstition that I have is that I always wear a jersey during the game when I’m watching the game. Other than that, I’m not too superstitious. But you know, you can’t be watching the game in regular clothing. Then you don’t feel like part of the team, you know, because I am part of the team. I’m the 12th man here. A very important part. Bills Mafia is the greatest fan base, and that’s two years running on CBS’s Bracket Challenge.


Maerck: Talk more about Bills Mafia.


Max: I’d love to. Bills Mafia isn’t something you’re a part of, it’s something that’s a part of you. Either you have it or you don’t. It’s something that you’ll see when a Bills fan is watching the game. We get rowdy. We get rowdier than any other fan base in the NFL. We’ve demonstrated that over and over again. The table breaking, that’s a Buffalo thing. And we’re very welcoming of people. If you want to be a part of the Mafia, come join. We’re happy to have you as long as you’re ready to get fucked up for the Bills like no other.


Maerck: What’s your favorite beer to drink while watching?


Max: I switch it up a lot, but I guess if I had to pick one beer to drink while I was watching the Bills, it would probably be an ice cold Bud Light. Back to the basics. My favorite beer growing up. That’s my relaxing beer. They go down so easy that you could put down 10 of them and you’ll be fine, whereas with an IPA, you’re starting to get a little fucking hammered and out of control after 10 if you drink that over the course of a Bills game.

Maerck: Speaking of out of control, what’s the craziest thing you’ve done or witnessed at a game, or tailgate, et cetera?


Max: One of the craziest things I’ve done was after the Bills made the playoffs for the first time in many years. When Andy Dalton scored that touchdown that sent the Bills to the playoffs, I immediately had my cousins hold my legs up and I did a keg stand for close to a minute.


Maerck: That’s great. What about something when you were already drunk?


Max: The drunkest I’ve ever been during a Bills game was Bills Chiefs last year. I met a friend at the bar to watch the game and have a couple of beers. I started drinking, they were called Resins, a type of IPA. These things were nine percent. It got to be about halftime and I was already pretty hammered and my boy ended up leaving. The next thing I know - I don’t remember anything after about halfway through the third quarter - I woke up the next morning in my bed. I checked the score and saw that we lost, and that must’ve caused me to drink even more. I don’t remember paying the bill and never saw it on my credit card. I probably drank 15 beers, racked up a fat bill and just never paid it. I feel awful for the waitress or the bartender who probably had to pay that. Anyway, my girlfriend told me I came home and pissed all over the floor in the bathroom. I didn’t puke though, so that was a plus.


Maerck: What do you want the people to know about you as a superfan of the Bills?


Max: I want the people to know that being a part of Bills Mafia and being a fan of the Bills, is unlike being a fan of any other team. The experience of going to four Super Bowls and losing all four of them and then getting to the 2000s and having your division dominated for 20 years, the feeling of having a team that’s finally winning after all that suffering. I don’t think there’s a better feeling in any NFL fan base. Even teams that win championships left and right don’t understand the feeling of having your team be so close so many times and having complete and utter letdowns of teams for such a long time. How good it feels to finally have a team that’s back on top again, that’s competing to win a championship. So being a Bills fan is better than any other fan base. I need people to know that for sure. Pats suck! O.J. didn’t do it.




If you totally agree with, or felt personally wronged by the views described above, that’s what the comment section is for. Who’s your team and why do you think they and their fan base are better than the Bills? Bills fans, defend your team better than the Bills defended their chance of winning back to back to back to back Super Bowls. The best answer could even end up landing the commenter an interview with LFG Sports.

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